Friday, August 22, 2008

Love Shove And All That Bullshit...



.. Or alternatively, Shove All That Love Up Your...

(A guest post)


When you sum it all up, Indian men have two psychological complexes which are complemented by the female of the Indian species equally well. But me being me, a prominent sexist and popularly titled MCP, I shall show you everything only from the male side of things, you do the substitution. For instance, when the man is doing his hero thing, the woman is doing her daddy thing.

1. The Hero complex
2. The Oedipus complex

If you look closely most Indian men at the beginning of courtship are always trying to save the woman. They're always like, "Are you in trouble? What happened? This That, come let me help you cross the road, go against your father's will, he's not the father of your life... more this and more that!" The man is known to go to the extent of trying to convince the woman she's in trouble only to save her. Yes of course, there are times when this backfires but the corollaries are not important to the theory.

And then they put on a cape and fly down (which they can't) so they tarzan swing down to help.
Post initial courtship phase: The hero phase causes sudden exhaustion of all the adrenaline they've gathered over a dry spell. They suddenly realise that their knees are weak and they need mumma back! But then of course they have to maintain hero image in front of girl, so they end up treating girl like mumma!

Just like the phases of grief, one doesn't always go through all the phases of courtship. Sometimes they tend to skip one or the other phase depending on how well the woman has adapted. Sometimes one phase lasts much longer than the other. Sometimes both of them together last as long as a lifetime. Sometimes women enter the man's life as second mummas only. Sometimes the men keep saving the woman forever and the woman keeps getting into trouble purposely to keep their attention.

Anyways, the point being once they run out of stories which dont fall into either of the above phases, there starts a conflict of interest. During this phase of conflict, the couple --
A. Either they really fall in love
OR
B. Starts cheating on each other/breaks up.

The third and most popular option is addiction. This where the post-courtship phase begins in case they don't fall in love, they get addicted to whatever hell one is putting the other through OR both are putting each other through. Even fear is a hormone one can get addicted to. Unlike A and B, the third option is not exclusive, it may come with packets of A and B as well.

Falling in love is very rare and tough because that would mean they'd have to accept how stupid they were during courtship. Heroes and Sons don't accept they're stupid. A damsel-not-in-distress and a mother will NEVER EVER accept that either.

So the ultimate question in all these relationships is: Once the drama dies, who will save them? Is this lack of drama another universal name for relationship? Some questions unfortunately can't be answered by mankind. Though one can always derive immense pleasure from this all when one is a third person viewer. If you're a first person experiencing it all, then the sex better be good and worth it.

Thus ends a lecture on Male-Female Non-Platonic Interactions. Thank you, don't come again...

2 comments:

Unknown said...
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Unknown said...

isn't it a delicate balance between endearing drama and downright pretence! romantic love is a self-destructive addiction. its the only form of love that doesnt allow you to let go :-)